Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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