Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize