i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
