Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize