Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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