If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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