clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
