He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
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