I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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