I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
