your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
