one two three fourrrrnication!
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
i need some magic done to my vagina
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize