BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
i want to swaddle you in tequila
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
