So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Dick very happy bro
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
