I can tuck mytits in my pants
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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