I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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