Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize