yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I deserve this hangover.
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