bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
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