Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
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