I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
21 MILFs That Made The Boys Crazy
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
23 Ladies Who Have Mastered The Art Of Squirting
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.