I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
