I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
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