I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize
