Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize