whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
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