Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
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