Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
