i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
