OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
