Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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