If i come over, it means nothing
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
In America we eat man semen.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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