Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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