I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
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