dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I need to calm my uterus...
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize