he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
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