just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize
