You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
