a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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