Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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