dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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