just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Randomize
