why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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