this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
should my penis look like a turkey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize