Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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