I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
