did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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