And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
