just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
