Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
