I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
