just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Randomize
